Morgan.

I laid your naughty brother down in his crib tonight. It was past bedtime. You asked gingerly if I had time to lay by you. How could I not have all the time in the world for you? I forget how gentle you are. I forget you are just five. I need to treat you younger, softer. I get so anxious for bedtime to come so that I can sit and breathe, I sometimes forget that you’re real. A sweet, real little soul, growing and growing. You are so sweet and so good.  

I held you extra close tonight. We chatted and you laughed at your own jokes, just like your father does. You said, through giggles, “I’m a silly boy!”. You sang, “I hope they call me on a mission, when I have grown a foot or two.” 

We only know one verse. I’m glad there are a few years between us and then.

We talked about your big day tomorrow, which will be bigger (harder) for me, I’m sure. This occasion, when it comes, will change our lives. A new beginning for you; an adventure. Though I’m convinced I’m not ready, I hope you know how happy I am and how proud I am of you, and how I can’t believe how smart and wonderful and brave you are. Sometimes I can’t believe you’re mine.

Tonight you told me you just wanted to stay home and “hang out” with me forever. If only I could pause time. If only. 

Oh, how I love you, my sweet Morgan boy.

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The child must know that he is a miracle, that since the beginning of the world there hasn't been, and until the end of the world there will not be, another child like him.
- Pablo Casals