Here.

I've been feeling that familiar fatigue come on and I've been trying hard to settle in. I remind myself this is usual for me this time of year, but it always fades so much in June and all throughout summer, that it hits like a ton of bricks in October and I feel like I'm 100 years old. (Maybe I am.) What I really want to do is climb in bed and sleep until spring. Of course, that's not an option. So we carry on, which means I hobble on like an old woman. We all wear sweats almost everyday and I cruise around sans make-up. It's what we do and it's what we do all winter long.

I complain to my mom and to Mr. Keller, but in comparison, I know my health struggles, or any other struggles for that matter, are so small compared to so many other hurting people. I think these quotes relate to us all. They've been so clarifying for me. I thought I would share them.


PS: Jeffrey R. Holland, I love. He's always so sweet.

"In speaking of mothers generally, I especially wish to praise and encourage young mothers. The work of a mother is hard, too often unheralded work. The young years are often those when either husband or wife—or both—may still be in school or in those earliest and leanest stages of developing the husband’s breadwinning capacities. Finances fluctuate daily between low and nonexistent. The apartment is usually decorated in one of two smart designs—Deseret Industries provincial or early Mother Hubbard. The car, if there is one, runs on smooth tires and an empty tank. But with night feedings and night teethings, often the greatest challenge of all for a young mother is simply fatigue. Through these years, mothers go longer on less sleep and give more to others with less personal renewal for themselves than any other group I know at any other time in life. It is not surprising when the shadows under their eyes sometimes vaguely resemble the state of Rhode Island."

Cheiko Ozakahki: Only you know your circumstances, your energy level, the needs of your children, and the emotional demands of your other obligations. Be wise during intensive seasons of your life. Cherish your agency, and don’t give it away casually. Don’t compare yourself to others — nearly always this will make you despondent."

Do the best you can through these years, but whatever else you do, cherish that role that is so uniquely yours and for which heaven itself sends angels to watch over you and your little ones.

-jeffery r. holland